Kailash – The ultimate pilgrimage of a lifetime

By Shambhavi Shambhu, UK

I was born in the northern state of India and moved to the UK in 2004. My family has always revered Lord Shiva as their family deity; funny enough, my father’s name is Kailash. Throughout my life, I have relied on my faith to guide me. Last year, both of my children, who had complex medical needs, passed away within a month of each other. This immense loss developed my spiritual strength.

In 2019, I was connected to my Guru, Swami, Sadhguru Sharavana Babaji, who has been holding my hand throughout my spiritual journey. Swami had told me a couple of years back that I would one day visit Mount Kailash, but I had no idea when this would come to fruition.

On May 5th, 2024, I came across an advertisement for a journey to Kailash with Mohanji. Mohanji Foundation has been organizing trips for spiritual seekers to Mount Kailash, and I felt incredibly blessed to be a part of this sacred pilgrimage. The moment I saw it, I knew this was the time. Without hesitation, I confirmed my place on the yatra. Mohanji’s teachings and his guidance profoundly influenced my spiritual journey.

In preparation, I began walking daily, starting with just 1km and gradually increasing to 15km. I also focused on my breathing. With each inhalation, I would chant “Om Hrim Namah Shivaya,” and with every exhalation, I repeated the mantra. This simple practice turned into conscious walking, something I hadn’t planned for but unfolded naturally. With each step, new realizations dawned on me, and I felt myself flowing inward.

As the departure date approached, I boarded a flight from London Heathrow to Kathmandu via Delhi, arriving in Kathmandu on the morning of August 11th. For the next four days, I soaked in the divine presence of Mohanji, preparing my body and soul for the journey ahead.

During satsang, Mohanji spoke about the significance of Gauri Kund, explaining that when you leave your most precious items there, they are offered at the Mother’s feet. The moment I heard this, I felt it was a message for me. The next day, I privately asked Mohanji if I should place my children’s photographs in Gauri Kund, as they are the most precious part of my life. He responded, ‘Yes, you must leave their photos, and also your own.’ In that instant, I knew that regardless of my physical condition, I was determined to make the journey to Gauri Kund.

On August 15th, we began the ascent toward Kailash by bus. Our first night was spent at Rasuwagadhi, a small town on the Nepal-Tibet border. On the 2nd day, we crossed into China, a process that took hours of queueing. But once across the border, I was in awe of the beauty of the natural surroundings, lush green trees, cascading waterfalls, and breathtaking views of the valleys. We made it to a town called Kerung, a small town at 2,800m above sea level. The energy here was dense, almost palpable, but I found solace in a stupa I visited during an evening walk.

The stupa’s calming presence balanced the heaviness of the surrounding area, and I felt a deep sense of peace there. I had a beautiful time with the Buddhist monks. They were quite curious about me, asking all sorts of questions about my Kailash Yatra and whether I was making the journey alone. Despite their limited English, we found a way to converse, share laughter, and connect. The monks even generously shared five dates with me as an offering.

On the morning of the third day, we set off for Saga, a town situated 4,800m above sea level. The journey took us up to 5,200m, and for the first time, I felt my chest tighten as I struggled to breathe. The key to surviving Saga was moving slowly and ensuring my breathing remained steady.

Saga felt ghostly—it was a smelly town with eerie, negative energy. When I reached Saga, I was okay, except my nose was blocked, so I said to my friend Lakshmi, “Let’s go to the pharmacy to get nasal spray.” On the way back, I started feeling uneasy, so I rushed to the hotel. Soon after, I began feeling nauseous and was sick 4-5 times. I felt my Swami’s presence very profoundly; he spoke internally, “Hold my shawl close to your chest.” I believe I was attacked by some negative energy there, but with God and Guru’s grace, I was protected during the experience. That night in Saga was difficult, and I kept vomiting until 2 a.m. I struggled to sleep; every time I drifted off, I would wake up gasping for air. By 4 a.m., I finally managed to sleep for a few hours. The 4th day was spent resting and taking short walks, but the night brought more challenges with breathing and abdominal pain.

Despite the struggles, I couldn’t contain my excitement for the next leg of the journey—to Lake Mansarovar. As soon as the lake came into view, all the hardships of the previous nights vanished. The beauty of this divine lake was captivating. We spent the night of the fifth day at Mansarovar, where the altitude was only slightly higher than Saga, allowing my body to acclimatize.

Divine Mansarovar Lake

On the 6th day, I participated in a yagna, a sacred fire ritual. The experience was mysteriously divine—I again felt the presence of my Swami. It was as if he lifted me to the top of snow-covered Mount Kailash, where I found myself in deep meditation for three hours. I felt my connection to the divine deeply and profoundly. After the homa, we left Mansarovar and travelled further to Darchen, the base camp for the Kailash circumambulation, or Parikrama. I stayed at a very comfortable hotel at Darchen that night.

On the 7th day, the journey to circumambulate Kailash began at Yam Dwar, a symbolic gateway where pilgrims leave behind their old lives, patterns, and habits. At Yam Dwar, I left my mind behind. I know it’s symbolic, but this is what I wished for. I walked about 10km that day, and it was beautiful. The mountains and rivers were so calming, and then suddenly, there it was—Mount Kailash! It was heart-melting to see it in person. I felt this was where I always wanted to be, and I could not stop myself from melting into tears. We spent the night at a dormitory in Dirapuk, which had an open view of Mount Kailash, and I couldn’t sleep at all. I just sat outside and looked at Kailash under the full moon. It was as if Kailash was keeping me company.

The 8th day had extremely tough terrain, and we had to walk 22km, mostly uphill, to reach Dolma La Pass. When I got to the top, I saw Gauri Kund, the sacred lake where Mother Parvati is said to bathe. As I mentioned, Mohanji had instructed me to visit Gauri Kund to offer my children’s and my own photos. Although I felt the journey was beyond my physical capacity, I had complete faith that the Mother Goddess would guide me there. The path involved descending 200m down steep and rocky steps from Dolma La Pass, making it seem like an impossible task to both reach and return. My porter refused to accompany me, but after seeing my determination, he decided to assist me, offering much-needed support.

Although I had never grieved openly after their passing, this moment at Gauri Kund was both difficult and relieving. I cried deeply at Mother’s abode, seeking the Mother’s acceptance for both my children and myself. As I stood by the icy waters, I felt a profound cleansing of the pain in my heart. By the time I climbed back up, I was breathless due to the high altitude of 5800m. A man suddenly approached my porter and handed him an oxygen canister for me, but before I could thank him, he disappeared. I felt Lord Shiva manifested there himself to help me. With deep satisfaction from having completed the second day, we reached Zutulphuk for a night’s stay.

Emerald Gauri Kund

The terrain on the 9th day was smooth to walk, and it was only around 10km. Then we took a bus back to Darchen to finish the circumambulation. The way back to Kathmandu wasn’t easy. There were landslides, the China border was closed, we didn’t get food for the whole day, and I even missed my helicopter ride, but I had a deep sense of acceptance for all the challenges. Finally, after traveling all night by bus, we made it back to Kathmandu on August 26th, just in time to catch my flight home.

And now, I’m back from the most incredible journey. I don’t have words to describe it, but if I had to sum it up, I’d say I realised that Kailash stands for equanimity—to stay calm and still amidst the storms of life. That was my takeaway from Kailash. Om Namah Shivaya!

|| JAI BRAHMARISHI MOHANJI ||

Edited & Published by – Testimonials Team, 10^th October 2024

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