By Linda Abrol, Netherlands
In the final part of this testimonial, Linda shares some of her beautiful experiences with Mohanji in India after the Empowered programme.
The moment I got home from Serbia at the end of October 2022, my existing problems worsened. It was as if the Kailash challenge had come home with me. And not unsolicited or unwanted. It was welcome but also extremely painful.
Energy prices were skyrocketing, and our popular vegetarian Indian restaurant, where energy is used in abundance for the tandoor oven, the big gas stove, and all the refrigerators and freezers, the dishwashers, the grease filtering system and lighting, was quickly heading toward bankruptcy.
My husband’s depression worsened together with our marital problems. And that to an unbearable point where my husband and I began to discuss divorce seriously. Since I didn’t have a job, ageing and osteoarthritis made the chance of finding a job difficult – living on my own seemed virtually impossible. Not wanting to depend on others, I faced the worst-case scenario of becoming homeless.
I simply witnessed the possibility and was amazed at how balanced and empowered I felt beneath the emotions and mind games. I kept my back straight and continued to practice my focus on alignment by concentrating on Guru Consciousness, self-acceptance, Kriya, inner silence and, in extreme situations, Pause Technique.
The same issue I faced during the days of the Empowered retreat in Serbia surfaced again and again – misunderstanding – but with more intensity. To the extent that I thought that no one really understood my pure intentions. Many loved ones seemed to look at me through a veil of their convictions, colours, ideas, and opinions and judged me for almost every decision I made with a pure heart.
My decisions seemed totally egoistic in the eyes of nearly all my dear ones, and their judgment seemed final. I felt extreme loneliness. Kailash and Empowered 5 energies seemed to intensify my challenges. Shiva takes everything and leaves you empty, but only with your permission. It is like buying a ticket for a rollercoaster ride and yet being surprised by its ferocity.
Fortunately, I didn’t resist even the deepest feeling of desperation and fear of the unknown and stayed considerably stable. Both Kailash and Empowered didn’t only trigger the trials. They gave the ‘medicines’ as well in the form of a deep underlying peace, acceptance and a feeling of absolute safety, no matter what happened.
In the midst of all personal trouble and trauma, I bought my ticket for India to attend Sri Sathya Sai Baba’s birthday celebration, which was being conducted yearly on the 23rd of November 2022 in Sri Soma Sai Skanda Ashram in Nidugatha, Maddur taluk, near Bangalore. This was the first time the celebrations were held without the presence of Swami Gopal Baba, who took samadhi in 2020.
After his samadhi, covid prevented any celebration in the ashram. While still in the body, he had asked all of us devotees to keep attending the celebrations even after his samadhi. I couldn’t disappoint my Guru, and although our financial situation seemed to be under immense pressure, I completely trusted that the universe (the Tradition) would take care.
But the deciding factor to go was the chance that Mohanji would attend the celebrations. A few months ago, I woke up with a strong feeling: how wonderful would it be to celebrate our beloved Sathya Sai Baba’s birthday in Swami Gopal Baba’s ashram in Mohanji’s divine presence?
Experience has taught me that those ‘satwic desires’ tended to come true. I called my friend Sita and told her of my vision. She said that her husband Nico had a dream in which he saw Mohanji in ‘Kalyanpur’s room’. Kalyanpur was a businessman who donated the money for many constructions in the ashram. He had an apartment in the ashram where he would stay when construction work was going on. This sounded wonderful to me. We decided that B. was the best person to invite Mohanji to the ashram personally, and Sita asked him if he was prepared to do that. He loved the idea and said he would consider it.
We took that as a ‘yes’ and assumed that Mohanji was officially invited. Every time I thought of my coming journey to the ashram, I felt the joy of Mohanji being there. Both Sita and I sent an unofficial WhatsApp message to Chris Greenwood, Mohanji’s EA, and I mentioned in a message to Preeti Duggal – still assuming that Mohanji was already invited – our sincere prayer that he would be willing to be present at the coming celebrations in Sri Soma Sai Skanda Ashram.
Mohanji was in Delhi and appeared to have extended his stay there beyond the expected arrival time in the Sri Soma Sai Skanda Ashram. He was North, and we were South. Somehow, I knew he would change his mind. There was no fear, doubt, or desire, simply a happy anticipation. And a prayer that all Swami’s disciples would feel Gopal Baba’s love through him.
Always when a great Master takes samadhi, and there is no appointed successor, a situation arises where there may be confusion about future plans, convictions, positions and opinions, mixed with intense feelings of mourning about the Master. As far as I could see, despite this turbulent time, Swami’s boys and sevadals did an amazing job of upholding the Guru’s will and maintaining the ashram according to his liking. They never missed performing a ritual that Swami Gopal Baba would have done, even if no attendee or visitor showed up.
A few days before the birthday celebrations, my travel companion, Yvonne, and I visited Mohanji’s ashram in Bangalore to join in the noon aarathi and to embrace Amma and Acchan, Mohanji’s parents. Rajesh Kamath was home and told us that Mohanji had changed his plan and cut his visit to Delhi short to come to the ashram in Nidugatha. I was over the moon with joy, as you can imagine.
On the 23rd of November, I heard Mohanji’s voice inside me: ‘… therefore, I was sent (from Delhi) to the South to look after my children.’ I experienced it as a confirmation of my prayer that Gopal Baba would bring clarity and happiness in the form of Mohanji. Swami Sri Gopal Baba was the embodiment of the divine Mother and – although occupying a male body – would call us her children. Now it was absolutely clear to me that she had come on this auspicious day to look after her children in my beloved Mohanji’s form.
When Mohanji actually arrived, and I got the chance to express a few words of gratitude, he simply said: ‘I had to come!’ What a blessing it was, and what a confirmation! Mohanji was received by Swami’s disciples with all regards, was invited to the sanctum sanctorum of the main (Kamakshi) temple, had lunch in Kalyanpur’s apartment, just like Nico’s dream had already predicted a year earlier, visited Swami’s house, walked hand in hand with the main trustee of the ashram, inaugurated the newly built dispensary and made each and every disciple happy by his unconditional love.
Beautiful pictures of this joyful occasion can be found on Mohanji’s official Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/MohanjiOfficial/posts/pfbid028ApVHoTyYQ5bYromd7Fn8mm3rHXtSYZHJaogaub8h2PCwwJuSd82P4WiEPWbD4awl
After the celebrations, the real mystery evolved. Who had officially invited Mohanji? It appeared that our assumption B. would do it had not come true. B. had not been able to invite Mohanji for some understandable reasons that he explained to us later. But he told us that Dinesh – one of Swami Gopal Baba’s devotees from Delhi, who happened to have walked the Outer Kora with Mohanji – had invited him during his recent stay in Delhi.
My Sherlock Homes instinct woke up. I sent a message to Dinesh. He answered: ‘No, I didn’t invite Mohanji. I only mentioned the celebrations to him. Mohanji then told me that He had heard about the celebrations from Preeti Duggal and a few others, and He ‘impulsively’ decided to attend them while talking to me.’ I was stunned to hear this.
Then who invited Mohanji officially? How did The Mother come to her children? Was it simply the innocent and sincere prayer of two of her children and a dream of a third that invited her all the way South? Dinesh and Sita said: ‘It was the Tradition that invited Mohanji.’ My inner voice had already confirmed that statement. Which mother needs an official invitation to come to her children? The mother is simply drawn towards her children when they need her. She knows every need, even before her child cries.
Miracles do happen, but it is not a good thing to assume things without checking facts and turning them into a miracle. Therefore I didn’t end my search here. I asked the managing trustee of the Sri Soma Sai Skanda ashram, and the missing part of the mystery got solved.
After hearing from Dinesh about Mohanji’s change of plans and his intention to visit the Sri Soma Skanda Ashram, they officially invited him for lunch and the inauguration ceremony of the dispensary, despite the intern rule of the Trust to not invite any spiritual Gurus or Masters to the ashram during major functions like Swamy aradhana, and Sathya Sai birthday. The reason was understandable and simple. They all would be busy with function activities and probably would not be able to receive their official and holy guests with proper rituals.
So, the actual miracle was that for Mohanji, the Trust members made an exception to their own rule. A miracle was that Mohanji came spontaneously, despite having other plans in Delhi. That it so happened that he had another function in Bangalore on the same day and could combine them conveniently.
Nico’s dream was part of the miracle, and our prayers that came true were part of the miracle. Our hearts being filled to the brim with love and joy was part of the miracle. Kannaiah’s presence and his being able to officially welcome Mohanji and attend to all his needs while Swami’s Indian disciples were busy with the function was part of the miracle.
Seeing Mohanji humbly bowing down in sincere respect to our Guru’s picture in his house, despite his own immeasurable spiritual status, was part of the miracle. Mohanji’s remark during our goodbye was that we were welcome in his ashram in Bangalore during the remainder of our stay in India was part of the miracle.
Sita, Nico, Yvonne and I were blessed to spend three afternoons with Mohanji before we flew home, with many hours of satsang. And with blessings and hugs of dear Amma and Achan, his parents who felt very very close, eating with the family, attending aarathi, watching Mohanji in the set up for a live zoom session, meditating in the guestroom while he was doing some other work.
On the day before our flight, Mohanji served us our meal like a divine Mother. He served every item with his own hands and didn’t forget anybody or anything. Once again, during this journey, he proved that he is not only the embodiment of the Divine Father but the Divine Mother as well!
These were sheer miracles and completely unexpected. On how we deserved this grace while Mohanji had such an incredibly busy life being involved in activities in 91+ countries, He answered (as I remember): ‘It is not easy to get to me like this. You have been involved with sadhana and with Masters for many years.’
We experienced so many blessed miracles on this journey that we had to ask ourselves: are we able to digest all this? As soon as I heard my limited thinking, I recognized the mind talk and directed my mind towards more elevated ways of watching the course of events: being with our Guru involves being open and limitless. There is nothing to digest. Digesting is limited to a person.
Being in divine presence requires simply flowing and experiencing the grace of every living moment. In the best-case scenario, there is only Him. My sincere prayer is: May we all be able to flow in Guru Consciousness, where there is no mine or me. Experience moment by moment. And as soon as we forget, may we wake up to his presence once again.
|| JAI BRAHMARISHI MOHANJI ||
Edited & Published by – Testimonials Team, 4th February 2023
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