By Dr Harpreet Wasir, India
Excited about another day in the operating room with two patients on board, I started working with my mother’s blessing and my GURU Mohanji’s name at my 6 am routine. In the first case, a young 43-year-old female patient underwent a successful heart bypass surgery and was shifted to the ICU by 12 noon in a stable condition. For the second patient, another bypass surgery was started in a routine manner.
In the middle of the second surgery, when the most crucial steps were on, and my own heart was in total sync with my brain and hands, shut to each and everything that the outer world had to provide, I got an SOS call from the ICU that our first patient has crashed (in medical words) which meant that there was no pulse nor any heartbeat and the Emergency CODE BLUE was sounded.
They had started all resuscitation manoeuvres, including external cardiac massages, pumping all emergency drugs and giving external shocks. Nothing seemed to be working. The phone, which was kept on speaker mode for me to hear, got me to a state not so frequently experienced by a heart surgeon, even though more than two decades of being in this field had taught me to stay non-reactive so as not to hamper my decision-making. However, any event such as this was unsparing to any so-called experienced surgeon.
All which came out of my mouth was, “Please keep the CPR on and don’t stop.” I could not get distracted from the stitches I was taking on the beating heart. I had to put my total concentration on the job at hand yet multitask to collaterally think and act as to what could have gone wrong as each second of CPR outside mattered.
Within minutes I completed the main part of the second surgery, handed the patient over to my team and ran towards the ICU. In those thirty seconds before I could reach the ICU, all that came to mind was what could have gone wrong and what options I had now. As I was nearing Bed No. 28, I consciously told Guru Mohanji and the Tradition,” Please guide all my thoughts, decisions and actions”.
There was nothing else except a crashed patient in front of me where all doctors were changing hands in cardiac resuscitation. The noise of KEEP GOING ON, PUMP THE ADRENALINE and SHOCK were words no one would have ever wanted to hear. Almost thirty minutes were over, and all activities continued. I took over the heart massage as I kept verbally asking questions and taking up all options open to me.
I could feel a helpless state, but I kept going. What simultaneously kept coming out alongside was, Mohanji, God, please, please help; this just can’t happen after a stable surgery. Nothing was working, and nearly forty minutes of the crash situation was over. Suddenly, something came out of my mouth. “Rush for the chest open set”.
I was ready to re-open the chest in the ICU itself and do an Internal Cardiac Massage, wherein I pump the heart with my hands to generate blood circulation pressure. The chest was opened, and I started massaging the heart with my bare gloved hands. The medicines were jacked up to more than 100 per cent, and we were nearing an hour.
I just kept going, occasionally seeing and now talking to the heart, “Wake up, please and give me some pressure.” No prayer was left, and I set an intention to call upon HIM. Suddenly I see a pressure wave on the screen and some electrical ECG activity. I asked everyone to stop and just see the monitor. We got a pressure wave. A new chapter opened now.
What next? I instructed that we rush back to the operating room. At a busy time when no OT is free, we got OT-7 ready to wheel in. All I could do was stay focused and just tell Baba to be with all of us. Not one person, including the trolley shifter, ceased not to hold my hand at this critical moment. It was as if all Hands of GOD were at work for the impossible.
When not more than 5 minutes of no blood to the brain are enough for permanent brain damage, we were talking of an hour plus of just artificial massage to the heart with so much time in between of no massages at all. The OT lights glowed brighter as if I didn’t need the headlight that I normally used always.
Instructions from all ends keep pouring, some for medications and others for fluids and blood, before we successfully put her on the bypass machine to support the heart. Two hours of heart-lung machine support, and we got some pressure. We got some urine indicating that blood to the kidneys was not compromised, yet we had no clue about the brain, which after the organ heart was of primary concern.
After three hours, we got off the heart-lung machine with some sustained pressure yet maximum medication support with almost six drugs, all at sky-high levels. By that time, it was clear that with so much handling of the heart, the heart had swollen up, and I could not close the chest with the risk of direct pressure on the heart.
When one part of me was just focused on the multitasking of the patient, another part of me was in direct synchronicity with the consciousness of my Guru, which I could never comprehend. I just knew he was there for me to do the best possible and nothing more. Not thinking about even the next minute and being in the given moment was what was happening. Just this awareness gave me more stability and strength to stay focused. Something deep inside had taken over my hands, thoughts and actions. By now, I was sure I had to shift her with an open sternum or chest. So be it.
The pressures in the ICU held well despite any belief, but that was not for me to analyse at all. The only concentration was if she was ok brain-wise and all body organs were functional. Another big concern was severe infections that no one could prevent in such crash situations where any antisepsis was impossible.
Talking to the relatives was equally difficult as a normal walk-in patient had to go through all this as the surgery went well. They had even seen her immediately post-surgery in the most stable situation. Everything possible was done, and now we were to see what would come to us as of her survival. On the one hand, I kept telling myself what more can we all do, and on the other hand, the belief and faith that what got her to this point would do its job. Everything tested me to my hilt, as if my breath did not belong to me.
I was thoughtless on the subconscious level yet vigilant on the physical level. I realised that I was human too and had all the right to behave as one, which I was doing. Prayers, faith and ACCEPTANCE to whatever I could do was my only armour, and we all kept going. I had to carry the sanity and positivity of my entire team and the patient and her family.
He kept me going on.
Our following review was to be done by 5 am the next morning. Nothing changed except we came down significantly on injectable medications, which was a very big thing. The sound of the ventilator and the monitor kept reassuring me to hold on to my faith and be in the moment. Now and then, the words that Mohanji always says, “I am with you, I’ll do my job” kept coming to me, but the physicality of the situation was such that I kept assuring myself of his assurances.
Another line which kept coming by now was Sai Baba’s connection, as in,”OM SAI RAKSHAK, SARVAM DEVA”. By 7 am, as if God was talking, it happened. I saw a small visible tear in her right eye, a strong indicator of some brain activity, yet we didn’t know if the brain activity was normal or not.
By 11 am, I called her name, and she opened her eyes. At that moment, the first thought which came to my mind was how minute we all are in front of HIS GRACE. I knew just like I had my Guru and God, she did too, and we all have to make it possible for all of us. They were making us do something and everything for some bigger picture never to be analysed by a supple human mind.
On day 4, we took her back to the operating room and closed her chest. On day 6, she was off the ventilator. To everyone’s surprise, all her blood reports normalised by day five, and all infections were well under control. On day 8, she was eating well, and on day 9, we got her out of bed. She was discharged on day 12 as any normal patient going home.
So much happened in these 12 days, which was a major shift of awareness for me. Clarity of life and existence came so much for me. The fact that she kept telling her relatives and me later that I was standing by her all the time is an obvious indicator of how my Guru worked through me, on her. Else how would she even remember me at all? It was the Guru she was with, and I was just a via media for her.
Secondly, I had the reinforcement of the fact that we are never and can and should never be the doers of any of our actions. All actions are HIS, and so are the RESULTS. We have to do our best in our complete awareness and leave the rest to HIM with the FAITH and BELIEF that HE knows best; my BABA knows best.
Thirdly, life is so unpredictable that we don’t know about our next moment, leaving apart all planning and predictions that if we think this, this will happen and if we believe that, that will happen. It’s all nonsense. When the switch has to shut off, it will, PERIOD. We have a short time on this physical planet and hence have no anger, hatred, or jealousy but only love, respect, and sharing. By the end of everything, only GRATITUDE is the teaching we can take and learn in Guru’s presence.
Not getting something is important to me, but to be eligible to get that thing which my Guru’s guidance and Grace will do, is more important. His hand on all my actions is foremost to me. He and I have to be ONE, and for that, all my prayers and work go.
As they say, I just treat, he heals and gets them to go, as seen in not only this but all patients he sends to me. So much could never be shared in this lifetime experience which, again, he has made me share with all. We all are so fortunate from so many lifetimes to be under the direct guidance and protection of a living Guru Mohanji.
Also, to understand how the life of any individual is without a guiding light around him or her in the form of a Guru or Guide. Having taken human birth, we are bound to go through our past and present karmic burdens and suffering, which we all experience in so many different ways.
My belief is very strong that this patient went home only because her Master and Guide totally protected her, and he or she proved it, and I could do my duty as I did purely because my Guru held my hand and for no other reason. Our duty aided this belief.
Legs tremble, and hands shake without a guide when situations such as this happen. He made me stand rock hard with a focus on my work. Who else but a realised Master can do all this, no one else! Period. It’s not about him but about me, what I want and can get out of him. I am clear that I want to dissolve in his consciousness fully, come what may. That’s my only job. Rest all is up to him and my eligibility.
I’m not wasting even a single thought in reaching this goal. By the end, I keep telling myself much more than ever that this human life is only to know God and be one with our Guru Consciousness. Experiences are what we study to pass this life exam and graduate to the final degree of LIBERATION.
Thank You, Father, my Guru Mohanji, for being there for all and raising our awareness to keep being continuously connected to Your Consciousness.
I had a dead heart in my hand, and when everything seemed to finish, YOU showed me the LIGHT within me, never ever to be forgotten to keep going on, and that you were, are and always will be there standing by the side of a true seeker.
Thank You with all my gratitude and prostration always.
|| JAI BRAHMARISHI MOHANJI ||
Edited & Published by – Testimonials Team, 27th April 2023
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