Pain and Suffering – Part 3

Ivana Kalinic, senior MTM practitioner

The day when Mohanji’s accident happened, I was on the phone with Barbara, and we were talking about how we both felt that something huge was going on, negative. We didn’t know what exactly. And at that point, Milica called me, and she told me to do a session for Father (Mohanji) urgently and that she would let me know what was happening. I was not worried at all; I was very focused and stable. I immediately sat and tapped into the situation.

I first saw Father, and huge, black energy, like a balloon, hit him strongly in the chest area. I saw that the intensity of the hit was so hard that it caused hard pressure. As his blood pressure increased immediately to a very high point, his ears started to buzz, and his arms were completely numb. And at that point, I didn’t know that he had a car accident and that the airbag opened up, so I was witnessing this part.

I could see his legs were also very numb, especially from the knees down; it looked like energy had started to withdraw from the body. That is when I received the message from Milica that they had a car accident, a head-on collision, and that Father was injured by the airbag, which opened and caused a severe hit in the chest.

Simultaneously on an astral level, so many things happened at once. Some of the things I will not share it is irrelevant to this story – it’s about the personal stories of many family members, which he took over at that time.

One scene that I saw was very important. I saw all the saints from our Tradition, various saints. I recognised some of them, and some were unknown to me. I could clearly say that they never incarnated on Earth. And they were all gathered around Mohanji, around his physical body. Only Shirdi Baba stood next to him; they were all very quiet and occupied. They didn’t even notice me; they didn’t even look at me. I was standing and observing. And they were all either praying or chanting; some were performing fire ceremonies. To me, it looked more like a ritual than some healing process.

I found it strange. I thought to myself that they were kind of passive, not actively healing his body. I felt something strange about that. Probably at that time, I was not ready to understand it, to comprehend it. I could see that, of course, in his true form, Mohanji was glowing in golden light. He was very well; he was smiling. He was not affected at all; his physical body was there.

At some point, they took him somewhere, and they didn’t allow me to come. I didn’t know what was happening. Meanwhile, Milica told me that it is a secret and not to share it with anyone, that only Preeti Duggal, Devi and me know what happened, and that he was not in the hospital. Hearing that he’s not in the hospital gave me additional confidence that all is well. That is when I closed up this process for that time.

In the morning, they went to the hospital. I knew Father was in pain, but even then, I didn’t realise the seriousness of the situation because the day before, I sent him a message, and at some point, he responded to that message. It was not related to the car accident; it was before the accident. He was basically responding to me from the hospital, which happened a few days back. I thought, “Okay, he’s responding to messages; let me directly check how he is.” He told me that he was having pain in the chest and heart, but he didn’t take any painkillers because he didn’t want to become numb and not understand whether the pain increased or decreased. 

But, even from the hospital, he was working, responding to messages, etc. That is when he also told me that the heart had a concussion and that the doctors were finding it serious, and they wanted to admit him to the hospital. Still, I could not relate to the seriousness of the situation because he looked completely fine in the sense that he was not panicking; he was not creating any drama. Of course, we know he never does that, but without that, it was hard to understand the seriousness of the situation in those circumstances.

When he mentioned the heart and the doctor’s diagnosis, I asked him, “Can we from the MTM group do a session for you for that situation?” He said, “Yes, but only work on the physical body. If I’m being recalled, do not touch that. And that is when I understood the actual seriousness of the situation. I started to panic. I remembered the scene I saw with the saints all together around them; I understood that it was a ritual of transition for exiting the body. Those rituals were for that purpose, not to heal his physical body. That is when I freaked out. I sat again to tap into this situation. I knew he said not to touch anything else, only to work on the physical body.

Then I understood and thought, “Oh my God, if they recall him, they’re not going to listen to us, and we are not allowed to interfere.” I thought maybe if we pray, that is how we can affect the situation. So I contacted the other members of the MTM group, and I asked them to all get together and witness what was happening and to pray. I thought they would not listen to me, but if more of us pray that he stays, perhaps they will be compassionate about this. Suddenly, some of these saints seemed so strict to me. I thought there would be no negotiation about it when they made their decision. That is when reality actually hit me. I understood what he meant when he said that his body belongs to the Tradition. Once they decide to recall him, it is going to happen. I mean, we cannot do anything about it. I felt totally helpless in that situation.

That is when I understood how selfish I am to think about myself in that situation, whether I am ready or not for his leaving. I could see that the entire Tradition was not really happy about how we treated Mohanji. I started to feel sad about how much we take his presence on Earth for granted. I mean, having a saint of such stature who can sit anywhere else in the universe and be of help and in service, and he’s sitting with us, and we are taking his time for granted, we are taking his presence for granted.

While witnessing that, I was still on the messages with him. I shared the feeling, and he sent me a heart. I was thinking again about how selfish I am. He was in ICU, waiting for the examination of his heart, and he was comforting me about the possibility of losing him. I mean, what a paradox.

When I saw his physical body during the session, in the second part, I saw that the heart was swollen, and one of the arteries had some leakage. And I could see that it is very seriously possible to have a fatal outcome. Again, I saw the saints sitting around. Some negotiation happened. I couldn’t understand everything, but I understood that some suggested that he leaves, and some suggested staying. Later on, Mohanji explained that some of them offered him to take another birth and live a short life, like up to 30 years and then exit.

Even in the first session the previous evening, I could see that they took him somewhere; I couldn’t see where, but he was happy. They allowed the heart issue to stay so they could call him back at any time.

The next day, when I looked at the situation again, when negotiations were happening, I could see that the possibility of him leaving was still open. So that is when I started to pray and pray more, and the MTM group prayed for him. At some point, I saw all of them leaving, and Mohanji’s physical form remained there.

At the same time, simultaneously, we were on messages. I told him that they all left and, “It seems like you’re stuck with us.” And that message didn’t reach him. WhatsApp said that it was sent but not received. That is when my mind started to get more and more active. I thought of the story he told us so many times about the guru whose disciples took him for granted, and at some point, he left his body. When he was on the way to the hospital, the Guru was still speaking to all the nurses and his disciples who were there. When they came to the hospital, they said he had died an hour ago. His last lesson for his disciples was proof of his stature, where he talked to them while he was dead.

That is when my mind started to think, “Oh, my God, what if he is actually dead, and he’s messaging me?” Because I knew anything was possible. I was restless until he received my message. I said, “Okay, luckily, we got out of it this time, but this can happen at any point.”

A few days after that, when Mohanji came to Novi Sad, I visited him with Barbara and Monika. He was so calm and happy as always. He was not affected by the situation at all. The second time when I did this session, I could physically feel his pain, the pressure on the chest area. Even now, whenever I talk about him in that sense, I can feel this pressure and pain. I’m amazed how he was not affected, not even a little.

When he was in the hospital, my mother asked me how I was and whether I was well. I realised I had completely forgotten that the previous day when he had an accident, during the day, not in the evening, I suddenly felt a sharp pain in my heart, and I could not breathe for a few minutes, and my arms were totally numb. Only when she asked me how I was I understood that it was kind of a premonition where I could feel that something was going to happen. But I totally forgot. 

When I saw him in Novi Sad, Mohanji told me, “People who are deeply connected would feel when I’m leaving.” Then I also remembered that 4-5 years back, I saw the vision of him leaving the body in 2022. I know that we got out of it this time. We had the grace from the Tradition that he stays a bit longer, but I’m also fully aware that they can withdraw him at any time. When we spoke, I told him that we were not ready for his leaving, and he said, “What not ready? Circumstances make you ready. Whatever happens to my physical body, do not slow down, and do not stop the work. Just keep going, keep doing your work.”

I understood how much I was attached to his physical form even though I communicate with him telepathically mostly. Even though I know that he will be even more accessible to us when he leaves the body, I can still feel the sorrow regarding his leaving. I hope that we will all take this as a wake-up call, as a warning that he might leave without further announcement, and that we need to take his presence on Earth with deep gratitude.

I now understand that every breath that we take is a blessing. But every breath we take, having Mohanji around physically, is a pure grace of Tradition. I am deeply grateful for this opportunity to walk with him, contribute to the platforms he established, and witness what he does for the entire world.

Even during this situation, he had tremendous physical pain but no suffering. And he had no distractions during pain. He was constantly working like nothing ever happened. And that is a true inspiration for me, always to see how selfless he is, how he constantly serves, without any expectations, without a need for gratification and for applause, just selflessly serving this world, as long as he lives. I really hope that he will stay with us long, but if he decides to leave or the Tradition decides to withdraw him, I am ever grateful to have this opportunity to be in his life. I also know that his mission and work will continue through all of us, and he will be available and guiding us even then.

Pain and Suffering – Part 1

Pain and Suffering – Part 2


Edited & Published by – Testimonials Team, 6th November 2022


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2 thoughts on “Pain and Suffering – Part 3”

  1. Thank you Ivana for penning this down. I too saw some part of what you experienced and it just blew me apart. It’s like a warning signal to all of us that we cannot take our Guru or the mission for granted. Time is ticking away and we have so much to accomplish. A big reminder from the tradition.

    1. I m a Shirdi Sai and Satya Sai devotee. Lov and feel very inclined towards mohanji. Just lost my 32 yrs old daughter and am in a shock . Read ur blogs abt mohanji and that’s how I m gathering myself

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