Beyond the Doors

Written by Tatyana Povarintseva (Macedonia)

The experience I would like to share proves the truth about the unity of all Masters. I hope it would be an inspiration for all seekers of truth.

It happened during the Power of Purity meditation in Macedonia on March 9th, 2016. I mention the date and place here so that other participants can recall their experience as I know that the meditation was very special and unusual for other meditators.

A couple of minutes after the beginning of the meditation, I received Shaktipat. During this process I saw a ray of light coming from above, entering my body and expanding inside. It opened itself like a fan unfolding 360 degrees and then suddenly an explosion of light happened. I felt like my personality disappeared in a second – I didn’t exist any more. There were no thoughts, no body, and no feelings, nothing… Just consciousness and space which contained nothing and everything at the same time.

After a while I started feeling like being Mohanji. I should mention at this point that since my first POP meditation I have been constantly experiencing this — I’m often aware of myself as being one with Mohanji. To be more precise, I witness being inside his body, looking at others with his eyes, bathing in his consciousness. So it might sound strange, but in a way I have got used to such an experience. It is still a miracle for me but I am not confused by it, as by now I am quite used to seeing it happen.
However, this time it was different.
Tatyana’s personality vanished completely; what was present was only the
observer, the witness. Right away I realized that I was Mohanji and the feeling was so intense that for a moment a few thoughts and worries appeared, “How will people see me? Will they see Tatyana’s body or Mohanji’s? They might get frightened if they see Mohanji instead of Tatyana”. Trust me, I was not sure at all if the changes were still on a subtle level or they appeared on a gross level as well. It seems hilarious now, but I was touching my face with my hand — checking if I had a real moustache, because I was sure that I was inside Mohanji’s body and felt it :).

Soon I gave up and just ignored these fears. After that immediately I was moved somewhere further, with a high speed to some different realms. My consciousness travelled to another plane. I realized that I had got transformed to somebody else, to be clear, I entered the consciousness of another being… I felt his arms outstretched, opened to both sides… and at once I found myself being Jesus, being in his consciousness and looking through his eyes. To my surprise, it happened to me despite the fact that I’ve never felt connected to Jesus before, neither deeply prayed to him, nor read the Bible. It appeared to be just a pure experience of his consciousness, without any expectations or knowledge. Simple as that.

I should explain at this point, that I’m Mohanji’s channel, so during the meditation he transfers energy through me to the meditators. That’s why a bit later I came up to the altar to do some preparations for the energy transfer. Although I was supposed to connect to Mohanji’s eyes, I was looking at Dattatreya’s picture instead. With all due respect to the instructions, I have been “breaking” them for several months already. I feel like connecting to Datta, because for me it’s still Mohanji but in a different form, which is less physical, more radiant. I don’t see any difference between them, honestly.
So I was looking at Dattatreya’s picture and right away I realized that Datta was standing behind me, energising my body with high energy. I became electrified, the energy was very powerful and it was burning out all the unnecessary baggage, and God knows what else, but still not burning out my organism. Everything was extremely intense but not more than my body could handle. I started transferring energy to the meditators and my arm, hand, fingers were moving on their own full of electricity. Again, during the transfer I felt as being Mohanji, our consciousness was one. Tatyana was far away and simply watching. I dissolved.

As soon as the meditation finished, I heard the inner voice, “And now you’re Tatyana”. I became sad for a moment, as it was so nice not to have a personality at all, nor your body, nothing — being light, being Mohanji, Jesus, being everything and nothing. But okay I knew it was right, everything that happened was right. It took me a while to come back to my body. What an unpleasant feeling! I had my time after the meditation, sitting still and silently enjoying the sweet energy from the source. After a while I made myself stand up, came and bowed in front of the altar. For a moment I looked at Shirdi Sai Baba statue and straightaway I was not just looking at him, but became him. I spent several minutes like that and when the experience finished, finally made myself go home. I couldn’t speak until the next morning; I didn’t want it to end at all and allowed myself to be silent.

All that has happened during this meditation was a great and precious experience for me for which I’m forever grateful. It showed me that we are all one; the division is just an illusion. I was aware that every person, not only me, is Jesus, Sai Baba and Mohanji at the same time. We are all one. And it’s not just intellectual knowledge for me any more. It had not been intellectual even before to some extent, but this experience made it even stronger.

There is no difference between us. Even the concept of disciple and Guru disappears when there are no borders between our consciousness. Believe me, you’ll never find where one finishes and another starts: Mohanji doesn’t exist, I don’t exist, Sai Baba, Jesus don’t exist. There’s only this huge ocean of consciousness which manifests in a variety of forms. The truth is, when I experienced being one with Mohanji, Jesus and Sai Baba during this meditation, it was the same for me, the same state which has no name or attributes of their personalities or special characteristics.

This is why now I feel that every Master is like a door. There are different doors which you can come across. It can be a thick, heavy metal door, an old wooden door with peeling paint, a soft padded door full of decorations. You look at them; they are so unique and attractive… But when you open one of them, as soon as you let the door-handle go, there’s no door, it’s not important any more, it doesn’t exist… When you enter there’s only space of nothingness which is everything at the same time… And different Masters are just different doors which lead us to the same space.

Love you.